The Things We Fear

This morning, a bee landed on my right shoulder and remained there for the next several minutes. I stayed as still as I could, wondering if she thought my blue tank top strap was a flower or if she had just recognized a temporary safe haven in the city. So many people have a gut reaction of fear when it comes to bees. In reality, bees only sting when threatened, which won’t happen if you are still and calm. Can you sense a metaphor?

When I was first accepted into graduate school at Temple, I became accustomed to the look of fear that many people from my hometown in the Philadelphia suburbs would give me when I told them I would be moving to an apartment in West Philly and commuting to North Philly for school. “Do you have a death wish?” I remember one person asking me. Collectively, these two neighborhoods are stigmatized as dangerous by many people in the area where I grew up and are generally thought of as places to be avoided.

True, Philadelphia is one of the highest crime cities in the country. And true, North Philadelphia in particular represents one of the highest concentrations of criminal activity in the city. But it is also true that there are people that call North Philadelphia home and go about their daily business here every day. It is also true that many of these people are working every day to make their Philadelphia neighborhoods safer. And there are so many incredible things about the places that get overlooked when you are only focusing on the statistics.

Today, I brought Evelyn some of pesto I made to put in the jars she had given me. Seeing her smile when I gave it to her was the highlight of my week. Working in the garden this summer has given me the privilege of experiencing so many of the kind, strong, and intelligent people that I never would have had the opportunity to interact with had I not been working in North Philadelphia. I know North Philly has its problems, and I am only experiencing the neighborhood from my small vantage point on the street corner where the garden is located, and only for a few hours of the day. But from that one small spot, in just a few weeks, I have found a sense of community to exist that seems rare in our society today.

I’m not advocating for putting oneself in harm’s way. I’m not saying to go walking through the street alone after dark. What I am saying is that the bee on my shoulder didn’t sting me, and it’s only because I wasn’t afraid that I got to watch it up close and be in awe of its beautiful wings and bright colors and the graceful way it took off when it decided to fly away.